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3/10 Wait, what do you mean I have two moms????? by Carol

Once upon a time (that is how my story starts) I was married.....to a man........we were happy.....we had two babies.....then we got a divorce...

Well, it wasn't exactly like that....that makes it sound as if we got a divorce because we had two kids.  That wasn't it at all.  It didn't work out....for a variety of reasons.  I am not going to air that dirty laundry out now...

And speaking of laundry, do you know I have done 4 loads already today, and am not yet done......sigh....but I digress.....

So where was I?  Oh yes, divorced.  So I had these two boys, and I bought a small three bedroom house, and we moved in (the boys and I).  They were little.  Z was 7 and J was 5.

Z and J

We had a nice life in that little house.  We were happy.

Then I fell in love..........and we decided to move in together and do something scary and somewhat crazy......we decided  to BLEND our families......

So I went to the library and started reading books about stepparenting ..and blended families, and what to expect...(isn't that what people do when confronted with a scary event..they read books about it)...and if that wasn't crazy and scary enough, I decided to fall in love with a WOMAN!!!!!  (call me crazy....)

K

So not only were we blending a family, we were blending a family with TWO moms.....sheesh, nothing like jumping into the deep end of the pool without looking.  We were blending 4 kids, 2 cats, 2 dogs, and 2 households....

We talked about the move, the transition, the kids, the animals, everything, we talked and talked, we made plans, we bought a house, and then we closed our eyes tight and held our breath.

Our kids knew each other and us.  We had been dating for over 6 months but had been best friends for a year before that...(who knew....).  My kids knew her and liked her.  Her kids knew me and liked me.  We had all vacationed together, the kids got along...(for the most part).  L was 13 (8th grade), B was 11 (6th grade), Z was 9 (4th grade) and J was 7 (2nd grade).  


So I told my kids, and they were totally okay with it. They loved K!!  K told her kids, and B was okay with it, but L was very unhappy.  She didn't want to live with "them".  So we talked about it, and K talked to L.  We read more books, and we decided it would be okay........  (gullible...I know..)


Things went pretty well even though L was a bit sullen.  We moved into the house in July 2006.  The summer went pretty well.  The kids moved in, got settled, and we got ready to enroll the in the local schools, changed addresses with bills, etc...all of the things you do when you move.


We moved into a very nice neighborhood, and through a mutual friend met B and N.  They were also a blended family with two moms!!  We were so excited to live in a neighborhood with another family that was like us.....   And they had lived in this neighborhood for quite a few years already, so the schools knew them (and were accepting), their kids were on local neighborhood sports teams, (and they were accepted), so we were not too concerned about prejudice towards us because we were "those" kind of people.

So we started having a normal life.  We went on vacations.......

Z, J, me, K, B. (L didn't want to be in the picture...)

We made gingerbread houses together...........

J, K, Z, B.  (L didn't want to be in the picture)

We even went to Gay Pride rally's in DC together....

J, me, Z, K (L and B stayed home)

We definitely had our share of problems....


I think we had more than the blended families with a mom and a dad.....I hope I do not step on any toes by saying that, but not only did our kids have to adjust to living with another adult and other kids, they had to adjust to being part of a "two mom" family.


We never pushed them to call the other adult anything other than by their first name.  We were also VERY careful to make sure we treated each kid fairly and not have an appearance of "us and them".


Even after reading books, and talking to friends, and doing the best we could, in the summer going into her 10th grade year, L told her mom she wanted to move out, and go live with her dad, (he lived in a nearby town).  This devastated K.  She felt sad and angry, and betrayed.....   L just couldn't get along with me, and for that I felt guilty.  Was I hard on her?  Yes.  Was I hard on the boys?  Yes.  Did I teat them unfairly?  No. She was just unable to adjust to living with me and my kids.


That was almost three years ago.  Since that time, the 5 of us who stayed in our house blended and bonded very well.  K loves "my" two as if they are her own, and I love her son B as if he was my own.  

K and the boys and me at DisneyWorld

Unfortunately there was a casualty to our blended family, and that was a loving relationship between L and I.  She had to move back in with us about 10 months ago, and she and I have never been able to mend our relationship.  She just won't let it happen. She won't let me love her, and she won't let me be her friend.  This has caused many problems between K and I, but our love is strong, and we know we will get through the hard times if we keep the lines of communication open, and keep talking...talking...talking...shouting?? yes but also talking...talking.......

So I keep reading books, and talking to friends, and every day I hope that when L grows up and becomes an adult she will be able to accept me in her life in a loving way.

In the meantime, K and I will keep doing the best we can to bond with the boys, and keep our family as normal as every other family.  So what, there are two moms, other families have two dads, and even others have grandparents raising kids.  Some have one mom, some have one dad, some have Aunts and Uncles as parents.  Some kids are adopted, some kids are fostered.... every family is different, and every family is special.  We have to draw on our strengths and try to overcome our weaknesses.....

Just like every other family.... 

Drivers, drivers everywhere....... by Carol

I drive.  I drive almost every day.  I drive on secondary streets and I drive on the highway.  I drive on the highway almost every day.

Carol, what is your point?  you might be asking...we all drive almost every day.... 
Well, I want to talk about the stuff I see and experience while I am out there on the road. 

For example, yesterday while I was on the highway, some dude cut me off, and I had to slam on my brakes to avoid rear ending him as he just barely squeaked in front of me.  This happens to me frequently when I get on the highway. What the hell is wrong with these people????  Where did they get their licenses?  Did they take Drivers Ed?  Do they even have a license?  Are they just idiots??


Okay, now I will be the first to say that I am NOT holier than thou.  I am not a perfect driver.  I speed.  I do.  I drive too fast.  Pretty much every time I drive on the highway I drive 5-10 miles over the limit.  I admit that. BUT I don't tailgate, I use my turn signals, I keep a safe distance, etc.


I took drivers ed when I was 16.  It was a program offered through my high school.  We had to sit in little car simulators and look at a big screen and "drive".

I know they still offer this in High School here in Virginia.  Whether or not is is free is up to each school district.  My stepdaughter's school offered the behind the wheel portion through her school at a modest fee of $75.00.  My son's school does not offer this, and WE are the behind the wheel teachers, or we have to pay approximately $120.00 for a person to come pick him up in one of those drivers ed cars, and teach him how to drive.  We are teaching him.

The rule in Virginia is:

"If you are a Virginia resident under age 19, you must complete a state-approved driver education program and hold your Virginia learner's permit for at least nine months.

If you are a Virginia resident, 19 years of age or older and you have never held a license issued by any state, U.S. territory or foreign country, you must hold a Virginia learner's permit for at least 30 days or show completion of a state-approved driver education program."

So I know these people have had drivers education either here or in another state.  So at some point they learned the proper way to drive..and yet....

Raise your hand if you have ever had anyone tailgate so closely you couldn't see their headlights, because you were going "too slow" for them? (raising my hand)  Okay, put them down.  

Now raise your hand if you have ever had someone cut in front of you and you had to slam your brakes on to avoid hitting them??  (raising my hand)  Okay, put them down.

Raise your hand if you have ever seen someone texting while driving?? (raising my hand)  Okay put them down.

(Did you all really sit at your computers and raise your hands???? ) I did.

That is my other rant......people texting while driving.  Or talking on their phones and having no clue what is going on around them.  (Now again I am not holier than thou. I do talk on the phone while driving, but my car is equipped with a blue tooth, so I can talk hands free, and don't even have to use one of those blue tooth things in my ear.)

Sorry, I am not funny today.  I am not feeling very funny.  My friend Susan (my blogging partner) got plowed over by a driver not paying attention while driving.  She was walking, he was driving, he ran her over, literally. A year later, she is still suffering with pain and facing possibly more surgeries.

How many of us know someone who was injured in a car crash due to negligence??  My partner was injured in a car crash about a year and a half ago.  She was rear-ended driving in a tunnel.  The worst part was I was just a few cars in front of her, and I heard the squeal, and saw her get hit.  I was helpless to do anything to stop it.

The strange thing is I have seen the phenomenon of decreased driving skills in my own stepdaughter.  She has her permit.  She has been driving for two years.  She does not have her license yet because she wastes her paychecks on dumb stuff (that is a whole other post), and can't afford to help pay for her insurance,  (a mandatory rule in our house for drivers).  When she first started driving she was timid..careful......took her time with turns and drove slowly and carefully.  Fast forward two years.  Now she speeds, has to be reminded to yield, doesn't always signal when she is making a turn, and generally is less careful.  When asked why the change, she just shrugs.......  sigh.....

So what happened?  Why did she get complacent?  Does she not realize that she is driving a machine that can kill?

Now my oldest son has his permit.  So far he is careful, and takes his time.  Only time will tell......

I would like to end with a video. Don't worry, it is not gross, or graphic.  But it may give us a clue as to why some people drive the way they do......  behold:

Have a great day, and be careful out there!!!

Carol- mother to two teen drivers, and two more to go.....

I have a secret........ posted by Carol

So I have a secret....... well its not TOTALLY a secret, but it is definitely not something I blab to everyone about.

I am a professional person.  I have three part time jobs.  I am a substitute teacher, I perform facials, chemical peels and microdermabrasions for Dr. Frederick Quarles (a local dermatologist), and I am the Youth Coordinator at the Unitarian Church of Norfolk in Norfolk Virginia.  All of these jobs are the kinds of jobs where I have to mind my P&Q's, be professional, and carry myself with a certain amount of modesty and decorum.

That being said, I don't blab about my secret life......the life of a gamer....an online gamer..... (although my youth at church know I play).....

You may be asking yourself, "What the heck is she talking about?"  So I guess a little background is needed.

One day about 3.5 years ago, my friend Sammy says to me, "Hey, I have been playing this online game, it is really cool, and you should check it out."  I was thinking "yeah right...", but I just turned up my nose and said, "No thanks, that doesn't really interest me."  She said, "Okay, but it is really fun."  I was like, no way...I would never play an online game....that is sooooo not me.

Fast forward a few months, and I am at the Gamestop, buying a game, and even paying a monthly "trial" subscription fee to "check it out"......  okay, ZOOM forward three years and now I have:

Delinda, level 85 Orc Hunter......(she is epic)

Yes people.....I am a World of Warcraft junkie....... "Hello, my name is Carol and I play World of Warcraft."

Now before you think anything judgemental, (not that you would, but I have to nip that in the butt), I am one of over 400,000 women (according to a UK Sunday Times article in Feb 2010) who play World of Warcraft, (also knows as WOW). 

So I started a little over three years ago with the character (toon) in the picture above.  She is an Orc (yes Orc) hunter.  She is level 85, (which is the highest level you can be in the game), and is pretty sought after for the damage she does.  (for you non gamers, that is how much she can kill, and how quickly....)

So, my friend Sammy did get me hooked, even though I didn't think I would like it....HA...what a laugh.  

Now, before you get all,  "Oh she is one of those people who sit around playing games all the time",  you need to know that I am a casual gamer.  I usually play at night, after 9 pm, when my children have gone to bed. However, in the summer when I am not working as much, or taking college classes I do tend to play more frequently.  


However, I really can't play as much as I would like, because my kids play also......ALL 4 of them.  And since two of my kids are on the same account as I am, we have to take turns playing........sigh......


My partner K has an account also.  We actually started playing the game together, but I started getting ahead of her, and ONE time....(TRULY it was only ONE time), got a little frustrated in a group situation (hell, we were dying over and over and over......frustration was running high......), and I (hanging my head in shame) yelled across the room at her, (we were on different computers in the same room), "What the hell are you doing?  You need to shoot the guys in FRONT of you!!!   Needless to say, she immediately logged off, and even though I begged her forgiveness, she has never played in a group setting with me again. (She will play on her own though).


I hate to say that I did that, but it is true....


So, yes, I play WOW.  It has become a family event for me.  I have people I have met on WOW who have become real life friends, and I have real life friends who I play with on WOW.  I also play with my nephews, and we can chat with each other using headsets while we play, so we can catch up on what is going on in our lives.  Even though we are thousands of miles apart.

I have three toons I play regularly: (Delinda,above is my first toon and my favorite))

Persephoni, level 25 Worgen Druid

 
And a level 78 Undead Priest named Morticcia, (get it..undead...Morticcia....you have to be over 35 to get that one)......that I can't show you because it is on K's account and apparently she changed the password, and forgot to tell me....(on purpose?????).  Maybe she isn't over the yelling incident??........ I better buy some flowers....


I play with a bunch of WOW friends in a group called a Guild.  Our guild name is Go Horde or Go Home.  We play on the Uldum server.  So if you play WOW and have a Horde toon on the Uldum realm, (sorry if I have lost you non gamers), look me up.  I play almost every night, and love to make new friends!!!


I want to leave you with a few videos that celebs have made about WOW, they are funny!!

and:

or even (I think this Toyota Tacoma one was Superbowl 2009):

 and who could forget??

So, maybe I will see you "in game".........


-Carol (Delinda, Persephone, Morticcia)

What a trip to Starbucks can accomplish...... Posted by Carol

So I am a bad mother.....I bribe my kids.  Yes I do.....   I admit it.  I don't always bribe my kids, but some situations call for a bribe.  You can call it positive reinforcement if it makes you feel better.  But we all know what it really is.............

My partner K and I wanted to have pictures taken of our family.  Our oldest is graduating high school this year, and (hopefully please dear God), moving out to start he next phase of her life.  We wanted a snapshot of where our family is now.  So we hired a FABULOUS (yes I know it's caps...she is THAT good) local photographer Leila Wylie (commercial: http://www.leilawyliephotography.com) to do our photos.

There are 6 of us in our family.  Do you know how hard that is for all of us to be looking the same way, not blinking, etc at the same time?  Well, it is pretty darn near impossible.  We spent two hours walking around Old Towne Portsmouth (Virginia) with Leila snapping away, and she ended up with 61 beautiful shots.  I want to share some of  them with you here.

Black and white of our oldest, K

16 year old B in a tree

Those are the oldest two kids.  K is a senior, so she will be leaving the family nest this year.  B is a sophomore, just turned 16, and learning how to drive (God help us).

then there is our too cool for himself (and everyone else) 14 year old (in a month) Z.

The baby of the family (please don't tell him I said that) is sweet J.  Precocious, smart as a whip, still loves his mamas.

There were some very nice photos that I will share with you.  Seriously, these kids could model......

B looking very handsome

Z chillin' (see I told you he is cool)

Sweet J

Pretty K

So the kids (and us) tromped around for two hours.  During our travels we came upon this weird old pipe thing.  It was in a lot where there had been a building that had obviously burned down.  This pipe thing was just there out in the open by itself.  (if you can tell me what it is you score BIG points).  Anyway, Z leans on it and strikes a James Dean pose (I know he doesn't know who James Dean is, but that is what it looks like to me).  If you don't know who James Dean is, google it.  :-)

Cool huh?....Z

So anyway, back to the bribe.  After about one and a half hours they just couldn't take it anymore.  They refused to smile.  They had pained looks on their faces.  All except sweet J.  He smiled every time.  So we turned to bribery. We tried threats first.  We said "if you look crappy, we are going to post them on Facebook and tag you."  They shrugged.  We begged, "please just smile, look nice, do your best, we are almost done."  They rolled their eyes.

My K and I

So we said, "If you just do your best for the next 20 minutes we will take you to Starbucks and buy you whatever you want to drink."  We must have looked pathetic, and they were probably thirsty, because they became very cooperative.

Then the mamas got happy.

So this is our family:  (photos by Leila Wylie)

Forever dog..... posted by Carol

Have any of you ever had a "forever dog"?

This is the animal that rides in your car to do errands with you, the one who you confide in, tell your problems to, is your best friend, playmate and psychiatrist all in one.  This is the dog who turns a horrible day into a fabulous day merely by greeting you with love an affection.  No matter how your day was, the minute you walk in the door, you are the most loved and important thing in the world!

I have had the joy of having a forever dog.  Some people are lucky and have more than one in their lifetime.  I have not been blessed in that way.  Now don't get me wrong, those of you who know me are aware that I currently have two dogs, and I do love them.  But they are not like my Amber.  

Amber was a dog who found me.  In 1992 I was stationed at a Reserve Center in Fayetteville, Arkansas.  I was outside taking a smoke break.....don't judge....we were all young and dumb once...... , and this cute little puppy runs up to me trailing a rope around her neck and jumps on my white skirt with muddy paws.  There were 4 of us outside.  Why she chose me????  It was love at first sight.  I had never even owned a dog in my life, but I decided that if nobody came to claim her by the end of the day I was going to take her home to care for her until her "real" owner showed up.

This was rural Arkansas folks....no chips...no tags...no collar.  Just a rope.  So I took her home, and within a week I decided she was mine. I named her Amber, and thus became a 15 year love affair.  We did everything together.  Ran errands, watched tv, went for walks, etc.  I was young and single, and Amber totally filled my heart!

She thought she was a lap dog, even after she turned into a 40 pound lab/pitt mix.  You could never convince that dog she did not belong in my lap cuddling.  She slept in my bed, and I even had an armchair that was "hers".

J playing with Amber's toes

During our time together I moved to 6 states with her, drove across the country with her, got married, had two kids, got divorced, and she was with me through it all.  I knew I could always count on Amber for unconditional love and support.  

She got out of the yard one day, and was struck by a car.  She was about 9 or 10 years old at that time.  The emergency vet was sure she was going to die that night, and gave her drugs to make her comfortable.  He was shocked when Amber was making a strong recovery the next morning. I wasn't.  I knew what she was made of.  She did recover from that head injury, although she lost her right eye, and had ruptured her ear drum (she was struck in her head by the car).  She also had a new bump on her skull that wasn't there before, but she was happy, and loving just as before the accident.  She ran a bit crooked after that, but her injury never slowed her down.

Looking back on it, I do think it was that injury that eventually took her life, although I will never truly know.  One day she started walking in circles and had nystagmus of her eyes. I called the vet, who promptly sedated her and thought maybe she had some vertigo going on that was a temporary thing.  Amber was 14.5 years old.  She recovered, but started walking in circles again within a couple of weeks.  The vet decided she had a brain tumor and there wasn't anything we could do except make her comfortable.  She was too old for surgery, so we made her comfortable, and did the most humane thing, which was to gently put her to sleep.  We were all with her loving on her when she died.  Her head was in my lap, being covered with kisses by myself, my partner K, and our children. She was covered in a blanket to be kept warm, and we all laid our hands on her to comfort her while she gently passed to the Rainbow Bridge.

Z sitting on Amber

Amber was the best dog EVER!!!  She was an amazing friend and confidante!  She was my best friend.  She is missed tremendously, and I will never be able to love a dog quite the same way.  I can only wish that everyone can have a love experience like mine.  It was amazing!  Amber was amazing!!

Aleve is my best friend today. Posted by Carol (Love and Lunch Money)

I am so sore today I can barely move.  Today Aleve is my best friend....You may be thinking, "Oh my gosh, what happened???"  Well, my friends, it is a totally preventable, totally my own fault situation.......I went back to the gym......sigh.....

I used to run.  I ran races, lots of races, 1/2 marathons, 8k, 5k, 10k, you name it, I ran everything except a full blown marathon.  It wasn't even that long ago.  I ran in 2008 and 2009.  But in 2010, I stopped.  Stopped cold....just stopped.  I recently noticed that I missed it, so I decided to start running again with the hope of running the Shamrock 8k in Virginia Beach, VA on March 19th.  But I have to tell you the way I am feeling today, that may just be a pipe dream.   I am sore, I am hurting, I am two years older..... what in the world made me think I could just "start running" again.  No working up to it, I just jumped in.  Oh , and I started working with a trainer last week too.  A "keep going, you can do it, come on, let's go, and by the way you need to cut out sugar and caffeine" type of trainer.  The kind you hate while you are working out, but love when you are done.  WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING??????    Puulleeease....I am a pudgy 45 year old lady for Pete's sake.  (I looked that up recently and actually know where that saying came from....but that is for another day).   And if he thinks I am cutting out caffeine he is CRAZY!!!

CUE FLASHBACK MUSIC........

So a little history about how all of this madness started:  In May 2008 my friend Wendi says...."Yes, I am running the Rock and Roll Half Marathon in Virginia Beach August 31st."  Then crazy me says, "Oh, I would like to do that...I think I can". 

Now, mind you, I spent 20 years in the Navy running a measly 1.5 miles every 4 months and HATING every minute of it, so what made me think I would enjoy running 13.2 miles?    It was sheer madness, but I thought it sounded kind of fun. (and no, I was not drinking pudding shots when I thought that....I hadn't even invented pudding shots yet)
     
I spent the summer of 2008 training. I downloaded a very cool training schedule, (for couch to half marathoners in 5 months), and got busy.  I started out walking mostly, but eventually got up to jogging 4.5mph, (which is quite an accomplishment on my 5 foot 4 inch stubby legs).  I was running 4-5 miles three times a week with my long runs (7-10 miles) on Saturdays. I even lost a few inches, although never lost a pound.....that could only happen to me.....
    
If my life was a Lifetime movie, the day of the Rock and Roll Half Marathon, I would have been in the "best shape of my life", and would have breezed through those 13.2 miles and come through the race victorious with my makeup intact.  Funny how life is not a Lifetime movie...at least not my life.
     
The reality was, the weather the day of the race was hotter and more humid than it had been in years for that race. Even with that I had fun until mile 8.  Then my stomach started getting queasy.  Mile 9, I started walking alot more than jogging, mile 10-11 I was walking with no jogging, and miles 11-13 I just wanted to finish the damn thing!  (one foot in front of the other...there has to be a finish line somewhere)
     
I FINALLY made it to the finish line where my family was waiting for me. They were so excited for me, it was so sweet.  The problem was, I barely recognized them....... I was dizzy and queasy. My feet hurt, and my head hurt. I don't remember much of the walk to the car.  I have a faint memory of being sick in the bushes outside a Catholic church on Pacific Avenue and the priest asking if I was okay......all I remember of the ride home was needing a bag to be sick in...many times. 

I spent the next 12 hours in bed thinking that I probably should go to the hospital for IV rehydration, but  I feared the needles sticks I knew would be coming my way.  I promised my partner Karol that if I wasn't better in 12 hours, I would let her take me to the hospital. I was ectstatic when I was able to keep a bit of pretzel and some gatorade down at the 11.5 hour mark...that meant NO needles!!!

FLASHBACK OVER

And now I am willing to go back.....back to the world of running.  I am even looking forward to training again.......see I really am a sicko....   However, there will be no more half marathons for me.  I will stick to 10k, 8k, and 5k races.  I will also no longer run races between June 15 and September 15th, but September 15 through June 15th, it is on baby!!  

I'll bet I can get in at least three races this spring before race season is over for me until fall 2011.  IF I can get out of my chair.  Okay, time to swallow some Aleve and get to the gym......

Carol,  (crazy???  maybe......)
   

Did you see that baby?? Posted by Love and Lunch Money

A baby is born.....it is beautiful.....sweet....innocent...cuddly...endless possibilities are in the future for this tiny bundle of joy.  I cooed, tickled, cried, laughed.  I loved and hugged and endured the crying, (and the nightly colic) and diapers because this was my first born, my sweet progeny.....the future of me....my existence......I was blindly in love with this sweet thing, and I promised to do anything in my power to care for, protect, love and nurture my sweet cherub......

Z one week old

                                                            
Have you looked at the faces of parents with a new baby?  Sure, they look tired, but they also look happy.  They have a glow.  They have a sweet baby they can pin their future hopes on.  That child can be anything...do anything...dream anything.  Those hopes show in the eyes a new parent. When I look back at my son's baby pictures I look happy, tired, but happy......

Z at age 5

                                                        

Fast forward 13 years................. you first need to look at the face of a parent with a teenager. Notice the gray hairs...the haggard look on their face.....the glassy stare of their eyes....the glow has been replaced by a dull ashen look.  The creases around their mouths show you they frown as much as they smile.  This is the face I see when I look in the mirror..... I live with three teenagers and a preteen....shoot me now....please......

Gone are the dreams of what my oldest child could be, only to be replaced by fears of this child never moving out......  I can tell you that I often wonder how in the world my 13 year old son Z will ever graduate 8th grade.  He doesn't turn in his homework, and his grades suffer for it.  Now mind you, Z does his homework.  He completes it. He even has beautiful penmanship.  He completes his homework and it goes to school with him.  It gets placed in his locker, and there it sits.  I have threatened Z.  I have bribed him, cajoled him, and cried.....nothing works. Short of following the kid from his locker to every class, I fear I am doomed to the role of nagging mother.  All because of his inability to take the paper out of his locker and put it in the teacher's hand.

Maybe I should go back to the days of pinning his homework to his shirt.  Do you think that might work?  It might however, since having something pinned to his shirt would reduce his "cool points", I am SURE that would never happen!!

I like to look at baby pictures of my Z.  I like to look at pictures of me back then....yes I looked tired, but I also had a glow to my face.   I can only hope that as Z gets older he will begin to become the man I envisioned the day I first laid eyes on him....but ONLY if he turns in his homework......sheesh......

-Carol.....mother to Z, the dude with the homework in his locker.

Pudding Shots

Pudding shooters

Okay, for those of you who have been reading this blog faithfully, you may remember me being thankful for sugar free pudding because if you have a bad day you can knock back two or three of those bad boys and not feel guilty.  Well, then my partner K shouted…..hey you could drink them like shots…..to which my brain said …. “PUDDING SHOTS……….YEAH!!”  

Now I am a very fortunate lady because I am lucky enough to have some awesome ladies that live in my neighborhood that I have become BFF’s with over the past few years. Sooooo, a couple of days after I talked about pudding shots in the blog, three of my BFF’s and I decided to drive together to go shopping at Trader Joes……ummmmm isn’t that what suburban housewives do???  

Hey, none of us had to work or go to school that day....don't be haters......

 So as we were driving we were discussing the blog and explaining it to my BFF M.R. (who had not yet read the blog and subsequently moved down the BFF list a spot).  As we were talking we realized we were all getting together (there are 7 families in this little BFF family group) to celebrate my son B’s 16^th birthday on the following Saturday, and we decided we needed to try to make pudding shots so I could blog about it. (Yeah, nothing in it for them either huh.....snort....)    So Friday I went shopping for puddings and made sure we had some tasty liquor and liquers to mix with the pudding.

So on Saturday night the families arrive and we decide to have a judging of different pudding flavors with different alcohols.  The two pudding flavors used were dark chocolate and vanilla.  I think the Jello sugar free dark chocolate is the creamiest of the chocolates, so that is what I bought, and plain vanilla for a different flavor palate.....don't I sound all Giada....  (you know I watch Food Network....Giada is a hottie...LOVE her)..... 

We used our resident fabulous mixologist M. to mix the alcohol and the pudding to make sure we had the right consistency and taste. He poured and whisked and tasted and poured and whisked and tasted to make sure all was right.  The first batch we made was chocolate with Baileys Irish Cream and Kahlua.

Mixologist M

Then we had some tasters.  And the results were................. (insert drum roll)

Big N.....says yes!

 and 

I think he was saying "that was F****** amazing!!"

and 

A. said YES!

Now we didn't leave out the others, but I was so busy tasting that I forgot to take pictures.....must have been the chocolate alcohol haze I was starting to go into........


Round number two was dark chocolate pudding and Godiva chocolate liquer....and the results were:

S. said YES!!

I have to say that one was my personal FAVE!!!


Then we tried:

Mixologist M.  whips up some magic!!

vanilla pudding and Buttershots.  Results:

again a YES!

and 

Steelers fan says YES!

and 

BFF M says YES!

THEN we got even more creative......do I need to mention that we had all had about 5 or 6 shots by this point......so, we got creative (wait I already said that), and mixed the chocolate and vanilla together:

UMMMMM tall shot glass C.  did NOT let out of her sight

That was my BFF C's shot glass, it was huge, and she DID NOT let it out of her hands......

Then we tried mixing choc and vanilla in the same glass: (does anyone hear an echo here?)

we did choc and vanilla in same glass

Then I decided to beat C. at her own game and pulled out a 9 oz cup....... I  just chucked the whole shot glass idea at that point.

bigger cup gets more pudding.....

a plastic cup........  more for me...

but then our friend N, decided he had an even better idea:

who needs a glass?

 and just so I make sure you see all of the pics:

My lovely partner K was sure enjoying that shot.....and yes, you should be jealous of me......

Mixologist M.......

Mixologist's spouse R.

6 degrees of M.R.  (every time we go anywhere she knows someone)

All in all a great night was had by all.  We decided that pudding shooters were awesome and tasty.  Over the summer we are going to make freezer pops with already premixed pudding and alcohol for a cold yummy treat!!!!


"Don't worry honey...mommy is just having a fudgesicle...."   


"NO baby, those are mommy's fudgesicles....mommy has different ones for you......"



Carol, (who should probably buy stock in Jello to support my new treat)..............

"You are Crazy"

“Are you crazy?”  “Wow, you are crazy?”   I hear that affirmation almost every day.  From coworkers, clients, fellow church goers, friends, and strangers.  That is mean; you might think….why would all of those people call you crazy.  That is just not nice.

I have to tell you that their comment is usually prefaced by my telling them: “yes, I have three part -time jobs, go to college part time, have a partner, 4 kids and 5 animals.”  First comes a glassy eyed stare, then their pupils get wide, then they shake their heads followed by the comment “Wow, you are crazy.”  Or the question “Are you crazy?”  Sometimes there is an expletive in the sentence as in “Wow, you are ******* crazy.”  So it is like an English lesson.  We have declaratory (statement) sentences, interrogative (question) sentences, exclamatory (shouting) sentences, and even the occasional imperative (command) sentence: “You need to stop being crazy.” 

Now before your eyes start to glaze over, you need to understand how my day goes and how I manage to fit all of this in.  (and yes, I am a bit crazy).  I do in fact have three part time jobs. I work as a Skin Care Specialist for a local well-known dermatologist (Dr. Frederick Quarles), but I make my own hours, and mainly work on Saturday mornings from 9:00-1:00.  I do work during the week sometimes, but as I already stated I make my own schedule, so I can fit my patients in where I can.

I also work as a Youth Coordinator (I work with 6^th through 12^th grade youth) at the Unitarian Church of Norfolk.  Besides the typical Sunday hours I have to be at the church, I pretty much work from home; so again, I can set my own hours.

The only job I have that actually has regular hours is the third job.  I substitute teach at the local Elementary School.  So of course I need to be there between certain hours when the kids are in school.  However, if my day is already full I can always say no. 

College is where things can sometimes get a bit dicey.  I do take either two or three classes per semester, but since I am using the VA Post 911 G.I. Bill to pay for school, (and I STRONGLY recommend any of you Vets to do the same, it is an AMAZING program), I only have to attend one class on campus.  The rest can be online.  So I do go to the campus on Mondays and Wednesdays from 9:30 – 10:45.  The other two classes I can do while in my pajamas sitting at my computer!!   Gotta LOVE it!!!

So then we get to the unpredictable part, my kids.  K., B., Z., and J.  They are 18, 15, 13, and 11 respectively.  They have a million things going on.  For example K is a high school senior and has a job to be transported to. B is a sophomore and he pretty much stays home, so he is easy, (God love him). Although is about to turn 16 and is looking for a job, so that will change soon. Z is in 8^th grade and he is in Boy Scouts, so he has to be carted to meetings, campouts, events, etc.  Then there is sweet little J. who is in Boy Scouts, takes acting classes, works in the nursery at church  (the apple didn’t fall far from the tree with THAT kid)……

K.

B.

Z.

J

The animals are easy.  They eat and sleep.  Well most of the time.  The dogs do need to be let in and out to do their business and one cat (Max) has an eating disorder and binges and purges, (usually on the carpet).  I am not sure why he can’t take three more steps and vomit on the linoleum for easy clean up, but I guess we can’t have it all…..

Dakota

So, am I crazy???  Maybe.  But I love my life! 

Bailey

Emmitt

 I am missing two cats, but I don't have photos of them.  I will show them to you all another time.

SCREECH!!  (brake squeal sound inserted there)      WAIT!!  I forgot the most amazing, lovely, wonderful woman in the world who I also do a myriad of things for….my K!  I love her, but might love her just a smidge more if she could put her coffee cup in the sink in the mornings….   (I hope she skips this blog….)   K works full time so I can afford to not work full time and have my crazy life.  She also puts up with me and my craziness with a smile on her face.  She supports ALL of my crazy half-baked ideas…. (that is a blog for another day), without questions.  She is the best…….

So anyway, I do have a crazy, hectic, zany, too full, amazing, wonderful,  and interesting life, but I wouldn’t trade with anyone……

CAROL, who is a bit crazed, but loving every minute of it